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From Mathew's Journal, 3-21-14

From Mathew’s Journal



3-21-14
Three times now I have woken up thinking I was being talked to.

The first time when I was starting chemo and they were giving me blood. I dreamt I was someone else, talking to a group of friends. When I awoke I had the distinct impression that the packet of blood was talking to me. And I could almost see it glowing in my mind’s eye.

The second two times was when I was lying on the couch and it was late and I dozed off. I awoke and Sequel is nudging against me “I thought you had left. I heard rumors of such ??coming back to this home. Could it be you? Could it be you? Yes, it is you! You’re back! You’re back.”


I’ve worked myself into a frenzy with note taking and trying to organize everything.
My anxiety starts to cripple me and I decide to take an Ativan. 
I bathe myself with baby wipes and look in the mirror.
“You’re 24 years old with a rare type of cancer. It would be strange if you had it all figured out.”



?? I can’t figure out this word.
Remeber that Sequel is one of his cats.
Mathew's handwriting gradually improves as he receives chemo and the tumor shrinks.

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